Thursday, July 15, 2010

Teetering Along

I'm on the teeter totter of creating some balance. This week started out in tears and is ending with, well less tears. So we are making progress yea? My impatience doesn't allow me see that "it" will get easier. It feels like the opposite. It feels like it's getting harder. I've been in my head all week trying to figure out how I can make this work. I thought about working 2 evenings a week so I could spend the day with him. Unfortunately, Preston can't go to daycare part time or else he will either lose his spot or I will have to pay full time tuition for part time care.

I stumbled on a small solution on Monday when I forgot my pump parts at home. Instead of running home to get them, I decided to go see Preston at daycare and nurse him. I can't explain how this brightened my day. So now I know that if I'm really missing him, I can just simply go see him. My other small solution was every once in a while to work an evening which will allow me to spend the day with him. We are testing it out next Thursday. You don't know how excited I am about it. I think we'll go to Baby and Me at the library like we did during maternity leave and then go to the park and enjoy the weather and some books. I'm sure playing hooky is not in the How to be a Great Parent Handbook but oh well, I'll deal with that guilt later.

3 comments:

luckyduck said...

I do understand. I am taking a leave of absence for at least a year. It was too hard finding that balance you are talking about. You are very lucky you can visit him on your lunch break. Doing that, and working an evening to free a day is great start to finding that balance.

What is funny for me is that I never thought it would be this hard. I thought I could go back to work without a problem, since I am a teacher the hours are kind. I am shocked at how hard all of this is.

Good luck!
Jill

anofferingoflove said...

i think playing hooky to hang out with your babe is the very essance of how to be a good parent!

the mid-day visit sounds great. i go home at lunch every day to see my girl, it makes such a difference!

Anonymous said...

Oh, I envy you being able to see your little man at lunch. I work 30 miles from home/the sitter's house, so it's not an option.
I'm glad you're starting to 'balance it out' little by little. Believe it or not, there will come a day when it won't be so hard.